Not necessarily doing stereotypical mum things like washing the clothes, doing housework, preparing dinner. I have simply just been busy being a mum to my daughter. I sit, lay, nap and dance with my baby for the majority of my day when I should be doing other things.
When Stephen has gone to work and the dogs have been let out and had their breakfast, I’m alone with my baby girl who has fallen asleep after her feed. Instead of taking this chance to have a much-needed shower, I lay next to her, staring at her, watching her eyes twitch while she dreams.
But there are so many things I should be doing. If I wrote everything down the list might actually be a mile long.
I should get up put on a load of washing and empty the dishwasher. But, instead I’m busy being a mum and giggling at my daughter’s bed hair.
I should get up and attempt to chisel off the probably rock-solid left-over Rusks porridge that was flung just about everywhere in the dining room the night before. But, instead I’m holding my daughters impossibly small hands, staring at the beautiful rolls in her arms.
I should get up, go through the clothes that don’t fit her anymore and reorganise her wardrobe. But, instead I’m laying here knowing just how fast this time will go by and how much I’ll miss this when she’s ‘too cool’ to hang out with Mummy.
By now the hypothetical load of washing would be finished and I should be hanging it up to dry. But, instead I’m busy being a mum and that means dancing around the kitchen listening to and singing ABBA with my baby, watching her laugh her little head off. Feeling pretty damn lucky to be her mum!
Yes, there are a million things every single day that I “should” be doing. Productive and responsible things - I’m an adult now, that’s how it works right?
But I’m also just a mum standing in front of her baby wishing and willing her not to grow up so fast!
Ottilie is 5 months old next week. The newborn bubble well and truly popped! She is getting stronger, smarter and more alert. I think I am too, so I’ve decided to make my own rules to motherhood. Yes all those “shoulds” do need to actually happen at some point, I have a house and family to care for. But who says the “shoulds” can’t be that we should sit down with a brew and inhale the fading newborn smell on our baby’s head?
Time is truly fleeting and this wild ride of raising a baby will one day (probably sooner than I think) become raising a teenager and guess what? All those things will STILL need doing. But I will never ever regret spending time with my baby over taking care of the chaos in the living room.